Rebirth. (”I’m not dead yet! I feel happy!”)
It’s been well over a month since my last post, but I have my reasons. Mainly, I thought my last post was important, so I wanted to make sure everyone got to read it once or twice. But I’ve also been busy, furiously trying to focus on what I’ve found to be worth focusing.
Before I start rambling, I’d like to announce that I will be baptized Saturday night at the 7pm service at The Village Church.
A few of you may be surprised that I have not been baptized yet, in which you’d be halfway right. Without getting too much into it, I was baptized as a child, sprinkled with water, at the Catholic church my mom attended. My relationship with Jesus did not fully begin until I accepted Him as my Lord and Savior about five years ago. I always wondered if I should get baptized again, hearing the popular phrase, “Once baptized, always baptized.” However, after reading through the Gospels, I feel led to be baptized as Jesus was baptized. This act will not save me, as I have been saved already, but it is my chance to show Jesus I love Him, and to my church, ask that they love me - that in my new life, I hope they will rebuke me, forgive me, and love me.
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” - 2 Cor 5:17
If you had asked me before I moved to Dallas what I thought about Christianity - the church, the Christians, the strange culture - I probably would have given you words of cynicism. To be honest, I still will. Because let’s face it. Christians give Christianity a bad name too often. Ultimately, I believe it’s up to God’s mercy to save unbelievers, but seriously, nothing will turn an unbeliever away from Jesus quicker than a hypocritical, self-righteous Christian.
I know this because I am too often that Christian. I have hated a brother and sister in need. I have created some imaginary ladder of goodness, ranking myself higher than others in the morality scale. I will try and justify my evil deeds, but be quick to condemn others. I have claimed that I love Jesus with all my heart, yet fail to show it. And I have seen my ugliness leave a bitter taste in people’s hearts.
I didn’t love the Church because of most people’s excuse - The Church is full of hypocrites. No, actually that is why I love the Church. It is a community of broken, ugly people that know they are in desperate need of a Savior. I didn’t love the Church because I saw churches as businesses. I saw their grand buildings, their well-dressed people, they new, hip services and contemporary music. I saw their desperate attempts to lure in new people, but too often I felt they missed the point.
But I didn’t give up on the Church. I continued to seek for a community of believers to share life with and prayed that this would not be a search in vain, something to quench my selfish needs. But the more I read the Scriptures, the more I craved community - some place to learn, some people to love, just somewhere I could admit that I am not okay and be safe.
I read somewhere that the bar is probably the closest thing some people get to church. Like the Cheers theme song goes, it’s “where everyone knows your name.” You can feel safe, accepted, and loved. But at what expense? And how long does that feeling last?
But I have finally found community. It is broken and it is tough, but we declare we are desperately in need of Jesus and desperate to love and be loved. I am excited to have the opportunity to stand in front of my church Saturday night and tell them my testimony (in a nutshell, of course). I am excited to have my small group and good friends present, even having one of my closest friends perform the baptism — that they can all witness the symbolism that I am dead to my old life, but am now alive in Jesus Christ, a new life. And I am excited to see where this journey continues to take me, forever thankful for everything it’s been so far.
(A cookie for whoever knows that movie I’m quoting in the title!)
Tags: 2 corinthians, baptism, Church, community, cynicism, the village church
By mandaloo, February 24, 2007 @ 7:48 am
it’s awesome to hear about your baptism - i’m so happy that you have found a community of people to worship and grow with. you continue to be an inspiration to me…
By jeromy, February 26, 2007 @ 11:52 am
congrats!
By dwightk, March 6, 2007 @ 1:03 pm
monty pyton
the holy grail
By jeromy, March 8, 2007 @ 10:24 am
you need to update more.
By neener, March 8, 2007 @ 5:23 pm
Dwight, we’ll grab a huge cookie if we ever cross paths again!